Hi everyone, I just started a TF2 fancomic series, if you guys would like to check it out.
It's my first webcomic ever and it's only a hobby, so i'm not trying to make it a really serious thing(:
It's fairly new, so I've only got 7 strips until now, but I upload 2 times a week.

Right now I've been relying solely on humor, but it will also contain some other more serious elements.

The storyline sets around the RED team, and how their incompetency has earned them missions like washing cars, mopping floors, etc. Until one day, their excellence at retrieving the Administrator's "secret package", earned them their first REAL mision.

I know, simple, but it's just chapter one's prologue.

It will be a chapter-based story, like, the next comic continues where the last one left off,(except for some random ones) BUT, what I'm trying to do is actually give each strip it's own "spice", as to be able to enjoy any of the strips by itself.

This way anybody new to the comic doesn't have to read from the very first one (I know, I currently have only 7 uploads...just wait) if they just want a quick laugh.

And I know a lot of people will like it, and a lot will say it's really bad, it's a matter of opinion, but I would really appreciate feedback about it, since I´new to this stuff(:

Well, I hope you guys like it!

http://www.bonktf2.thecomicseries.com

I'm also asking for suggestions on the background color, font size and color, etc.


AND PLEASE, don't make yourself look like an idiot by posting things like "Man,are you a 10 year old?" or "Dude, you suck,get a life,blah blah blah"
If you're gonna criticize, please do it in a constructive and INTELLIGENT way.

P.S. Be sure to check out strip #5, "Ol' Boston Style", my favorite until now

I would say that the biggest flaw in your comic is that it has a very low joke/plot density. I mean, it has quite a lot of potential but the format is slowing it down.

It's a bit like CAD, if you read it. It often has two panels that serve no real puporse.

For example, in the Dustbowl comic I find the part about the Demoman slow. I think that you can remove some panels to make it faster (And thus better and funnier).

For example:

1) Hey, where's Demoman?
2) Demoman charging
3) Explosion
4) Sentries

(That's 2 less panels)

And then you can remove the second to last panel, we already know the Demoman is in some serious pain so it's redundant. The punchline was already ready, there's no need for that panel.

Hope that helps.

Site won't let me view any of it.

The forum code and HTML embedding look out of place. Use a JavaScript script to hide it unless people click on something. I'd suggest using JavaScript to put them in a collapsible div.

I would say that the biggest flaw in your comic is that it has a very low joke/plot density. I mean, it has quite a lot of potential but the format is slowing it down.

It's a bit like CAD, if you read it. It often has two panels that serve no real puporse.

For example, in the Dustbowl comic I find the part about the Demoman slow. I think that you can remove some panels to make it faster (And thus better and funnier).

For example:

1) Hey, where's Demoman?
2) Demoman charging
3) Explosion
4) Sentries

(That's 2 less panels)

And then you can remove the second to last panel, we already know the Demoman is in some serious pain so it's redundant. The punchline was already ready, there's no need for that panel.

Hope that helps.


Hmm I think it depends more on each person's personal opinion and reading preferences.
For example, some time ago some people told me I should distribute the dialogue on more panels, add more wordless - reactions only panels, that it would help with the pacing and things like that.

I'm aware I may sometimes add too much, you got the point, I will work on that, and also on the point that most of the jokes don't really a lot to do with the plot(:

Anyways, thanks for the advice, you can be sure I'll work on that kind of details.

Bonk is celebrating it's 1st month anniversary! Special strip is up!

Everybody, just to let you know that Bonk has been revived, after being dead for such a long time.

I decided to restart the plot, due to me wanting an actual plot to follow. You can still read the old archive, just remember we're now focusing on a new plot(:

Now go! (http://bonktf2.webcomic.ws/)

You've done some good work there with setting, camera, etc. I'm impressed by how good the comic looks.

My critique is that the theme doesn't fit the medium: you're making, at present, a serious drama with cartoony, comical Team Fortress characters. The two mix awkwardly, and it shows.

I can see what you're saying, the high contrast between the cartoony feel and the serious mood is something that (up to some degree) I've been unconsciously aiming for, at least for this particular chapter.

I know there's still not much to take from where the plot is right now, and from what there is, it's hard to believe that I'm not trying to focus on a "dramatic" series. I'm planning on having a short chapter for each character, focusing on their past and the events and actions that led them to join the team, with each of them having a different atmosphere to them. The current tense mood is only to try to "reinforce" the Engineer's pain.

If you read the old archive, you'll notice it was mostly jokes and toilet humor. While it was "good" up to some point, I wanted to make an actual plot, something more about the characters that TF2 fans enjoy. This time I will try to have a harmonized balance between drama and comedy, even though comedy hasn't shown up yet(:

I really appreciate your critique, and I'd also like to thank you for taking the time to read it ;)